Transitions

It's been almost a month since my last post, and that month has seen a lot of preparation for my departure, which is now less than 3 weeks away. I've been on my "farewell" aka "hasta luego" tour, including a weekend in Chicago/South Bend for my 10-year college reunion, and a way-too-short weekend in Oregon to visit my cousin Claire.

One really difficult part of all of this prep for leaving is having to say goodbye so many times. The first time it really hit me how much I was leaving behind was the Recognition Night at the evening ESOL program that I work in. The depth of gratitude and sadness that students and coworkers expressed was very touching, although it didn't fully sink in until I was driving home after it ended. It was exactly one month before my departure date, and it hit me hard how much I would be missed, and what I would be saying goodbye to. I cried for a long time, and it was a really tough night for me, but I think it was necessary and kind of cleansing. It's like I got it out of my system on that night, and while the days since have definitely been emotional for me, I haven't felt that level of sadness.

I keep reminding myself of the transitions I have survived in the past, particularly when I moved to Spain in 2002. I had been there for about 3 weeks, long enough for the novelty to have worn off, but I hadn't really settled in or made friends yet. I felt really lonely and started wondering why I had made the move in the first place. Then I received an e-mail from an old friend (thanks Mandi!), asking me if I had reached the point where I'm wondering why I made the move... And I realized with relief that it was a natural part of transitioning, that it wasn't a sign I had made a huge mistake...

I've also been having discussions with another wise friend about transitions, and this Hall & Oates fan reminded me that the month before and after a major change occurs is always a time of intense transition, with all sorts of challenges. And this makes total sense to me, so I'm trying to be strong for this stage of things, and be prepared for what may be challenging weeks once I get to Mexico.

One exciting development is that I made plans for a short trip to Guatemala at the end of July, right before I start officially working. I will be meeting up with one of my very best college friends (yay Josie!) and her parents, and I already know what a wonderful feeling it will be to see familiar faces in such an unlikely place. Also, one of the travel goals that I had set for this coming year included visiting Guatemala, so now I'll be able to check that off my list! Another day, another passport stamp... : )